


Shizu-chan Can Do Magic?

by Devyn



Category: Durarara!!
Genre: Crappy title shh, Humor, M/M, Magic, Probably some out of character moments but let's face it who is always in character, Shizaya - Freeform, Witchcraft, first durarara fic pls don't hurt me, magic book, shizuo does magic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-07-12
Updated: 2015-07-21
Packaged: 2018-04-08 22:00:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,122
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4322313
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Devyn/pseuds/Devyn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Izaya is always one step ahead of Shizuo, and it annoys the crap out of him. On the side of the street he finds a big black book, which is a game changer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Inveniet Eam

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! Welcome to my first Shizaya fic! I wrote this at like 1 am and it's terribly beta'd by Balthagiggles (Hmu, I write fics too) so it's probably dreadful but I thought it was funny. Enjoy!  
> Also the chapter/spell names are Latin that's from google translate so if I accidentally said I screwed your mom or smth I'm sorry

Monsters are interesting, especially when they believe in witchcraft.

They're hilarious when they try to use it against you.

So when Izaya ran away from a brute with a giant black book in his hands screaming gibberish at him, he can't help but laugh.

That is, until Izaya found his face slammed into the front door of his apartment when he was positive he was in the streets of Ikebukuro not ten seconds ago. He took a step back, head spinning and eyes narrowed in confusion.

"Did Shizu-chan just attempt witchcraft... And succeed?" He attempted to laugh it off, but for once in his life Izaya found himself actually afraid of the protozoan.

**One Day Earlier**

Shizuo stormed around Ikebukuro, muttering death threats with his fists clenched. He had just finished a fight with Izaya, and his insults were still flying around his skull.

"That damn flea, always getting on my nerves," he hissed, anger taking over as he crushed a stop sign next to him.

Shizuo could never get the upper hand in their fights. Izaya was always one step ahead of him, which was outright annoying. Shizuo knew he needed to figure out a way to beat the flea, but he had no clue how.

That was when he noticed a thick, black, leather bound book on the sidewalk in front of him. Automatically, red lights flashed in his head, telling him this book was not safe and it should stay as far away from his as possible. But curiosity overruled common sense, split second decision causing Shizuo to pick up the book and carry it back to his apartment. 

The second he got home, he locked his door and closed all of the blinds. Shizuo plopped the book on his counter, opening it to the front page almost impatiently.

_This notebook belongs to:  
Harold Sweeney   
Merlin's bumbling apprentice _

Shizuo furrowed his eyebrows, staring at the book in confusion. Was he _really_ supposed to believe that this book was a spell book, technically from Merlin himself? Shizuo scoffed, but found himself compelled to look through the book. He flipped the page, eyes widening at a spell that would actually be useful to him. 

_exterminare  
Have something annoying bothering you? Whether it be a person, a bug, an animal, or even an object, say this spell and the person will be sent to where they came from! _

Shizuo stared at it, wondering if it would actually work. To test it out, Shizuo grabbed a cup from his cabinet and walked out the door, heading to the outside of the building. He set the cup on the ground, looking at the book and reciting what looked like nonsense out loud.

When he looked back to where he put the cup, it was gone. 

Shizuo ran as fast as he could to his apartment, gasping when he saw the glass at the front door.

He suddenly had a grin on his face that made him look insane.

Tomorrow was going to be fun.


	2. Scabiem Dolar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shizu-chan performs a second spell on Izaya.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry I lied to you guys about when this chapter was posted!!! I was probably going to procrastinate it longer, but I had an itch to get this chapter out (my procrastination in really baaaaaad). Hope you enjoy! :D  
> If you have a request for a spell to cast on poor Iza-kun, leave it in a comment and I'll see what I can do!

Shizuo walked skipped through Ikebukuro, book under his arm and a sadistic grin on his face. After the first spell proved effective on the flea, he had spent all night looking through the book to find spells to cast on him.

\--

Even with the events of the day before, Izaya found himself in the streets of Ikebukuro. He was afraid, but he was more intrigued than anything. How badly could Izaya be harmed by these spells, anyway?

"I'm surprised you showed up today, Iz-ay-a-kun," Shizuo laughed, seeming to appear from the shadows. 

"And what does Shizu-chan mean by tha-" before he could finish, Izaya had nonsense words thrown at him. He stood there for a couple seconds after Shizuo was finished, expecting something to happen. Nothing did.

Izaya burst into laughter, unable to stop himself. "Shizu-chan thought he could cast a spell on me, huh? Looks like he's so stupid he can't even read gibberish right!" He breathed, wiping a tear from his eye. 

"If that's all you have, I'm going home. Today you aren't worthy of chasing me," he said, walking away. He headed to Shinjuku, scratching a small itch on the inside of his arm. 

_Just you wait, flea. Soon you will be experiencing hell,_ Shizuo thought to himself with a chuckle. 

Izaya walked into his apartment knowing something was very wrong. The small itch was not going away; in fact, the itch had spread through his whole arm. He walked to his computer scratching his arm like mad, earning an incredulous stare from Namie.

"You're acting weirder than normal. Have you finally lost your grip on reality?" She commented.

"Shut up, Namie, and get me something to get rid of this!" He spat, giving Namie a look that meant she was dead if she didn't do something fast.

When Namie threw a bottle of itch cream at him, Izaya slathered it on his arm in near desperation, almost starting to cry when it made the itch worse. It spread to his shoulder and down spine. Not to long after the itch had taken over his whole body.

"Stop looking at me like that!" Izaya said to a staring Namie, getting up and leaving his apartment.

"I hope that whatever the hell he has isn't contagious," Namie sighed when the door was closed.

\--

Izaya burst into Shizuo's unlocked apartment, frantically looking for the beast so he could stop the dreadful itch. However, he wasn't anywhere to be seen. The only object that stuck out to Izaya was five cartons of goat's milk strategically placed in the middle of the room. Izaya walked swiftly to them, noticing a note.

_I told you it would work, flea. It turns out the only cure to this is to bathe in goat's milk. Have fun!_

Izaya's eyes narrowed in anger. _You shouldn't mess with me, Shizu-chan,_ he thought, but picked up the cartons anyway. 

He headed to Shizuo's bathroom, because he went through so much trouble already and is there really anything wrong with bathing in your arch enemy's bathtub? The problem was that Shizuo guessed he would decide that, and was practically rolling on the floor in laughter when Izaya walked in. Izaya pulled out his switchblade with a shaky, burning, itchy hand. 

"Move away from the bathtub, and no one gets hurt," he said, opening the cartons of milk frantically and pouring them into the tub. _How do you even know if this will work? Is smelling like livestock for a week really worth getting rid of this?_ Izaya thought, but soon the itch was too much and he practically jumped into the tub.

Izaya had never felt better in his life. 

"I can't do magic? I beg to differ."


End file.
